Hermosa & the Bi☥ch

A few yrs ago whilst in the midst of some catty femle beef I looked up BIPOLAR becuz of how it was 'joked' about being had. When I found out it was a depression, I decided to stop saying "I'm bipolar" not wanting to accept/speak depression on myself/others. I refer to ppl's flip flop personality as 'sour patch kid' now instead. I know what it's like to be depressed. I have had many a suicide thoughts. I once drank alcohol & took the few pills I had at my disposal hoping to die. I cope by holding on to a fantasy that I will see my baby bro in heaven 1 day, long as I don't die from suicide. I occasionally drink/smoke/take medicines. I create fantasies in my head where things are different, I am happier. I don't dwell on my 'problems' nor do I talk about them. I have sex. I don't want counseling anymore. It was a time I did, and no one took me seriously. I have survived this long, this way. I'm actually sharing this ...

  April showers bring May flowers But what good comes of October's rain??? My tears are masked by every drop and I pretend to be scared of thunder To hide my pain I found the red October It's the month covered in my loved ones blood My heart was buried there If we really reap what we sow Maybe one day I'll be able to love again

It's funny how niggers reppin shit that don't concern them Ready 2 die for somebody who don't even claim them. Wonder why the white folks got everything niggers lack yet can't see why they call you by that name. Say you "Pimp hoes!" but Crackers pimp you just the same. Ain't got no blacks with power cause we can't support nobody who ain't talking bout how he love hoes, slang dope, and pop them thangs but when his brother lie dead in the gutter he now yellin how,"Homie didn't deserve to die!" Black kids gone missing but don't nobody care. Gulz gone wild cause Daddy wasn't there. Fellaz don't see no future for themselves We hate racist, slavery, and anybody who don't see BLACK as right My bad BLUE as right No my fault RED! Shit Red leaves you dead, nobody blue true and it be them coloreds who do it to you. Fuck this shit cause the only color I'm after is the PEARLY GATES of HEA...